Compulsive sexual behaviors that involve the internet and pornography can take on a number of manifestations. You might be looking up a “date” on Craigslist, using explicit chat, or masturbating to online pornography or webcams to name a few.
This addiction has the same traits as the other addictions. You have probably spent some time thinking that:
- It isn’t a problem
- I can stop anytime I want to
- No one is really getting hurt.
What you come to realize is that:
- There are many evenings in which hours fly by and you have lost quality time with your family
- You have work that keeps piling up
- You become less excited about real life and the people in it
Paul Simpson states in his website Sex Struggles that internet pornography has become the “crack cocaine” of the sexual addictions.
Per Cooper (1998) shows there are three primary factors that make online porn use and other sexual behavior so seductive and difficult to quit.
Accessibility: There are millions of sites, 24-7, and they are delivered inside your front door.
Affordability: Web prices are low, and there are many “free” porn sites.
Anonymity: You can be (or not be) whoever you want to be (or not be). You do not have to be seen unless you want to be seen. You do not have to check out a magazine at the drug store or a video at the local video shop.
We are prepared to listen to your concerns about your particular online sexual behavior or internet pornography addiction. We then collaborate with you on identifying goals and designing interventions.
Cyber Sex Addiction Checklist
The Cyber Sex Addiction Checklist is a set of questions to help you see your sexual activity more clearly. It is an assessment of sexually compulsive or addictive behavior. A high number of YES answers may be a sign of some issues with sex addiction. After using this questionnaire, please consult a trained professional to discuss these issues further.
- Spending increasing amounts of online time focused on sexual or romantic intrigue or involvement.
- Involvement in multiple romantic or sexual affairs in chat rooms, Internet or BBS.
- Not considering online sexual or romantic “affairs” to be a possible violation of spousal/partnership commitments.
- Failed attempts to cut back on frequency of online or Internet sexual and romantic involvement or interaction.
- Online use interferes with work (tired or late due to previous night’s use, online while at work, etc.).
- Online use interferes with primary relationships (e.g., minimizing or lying to partners about online activities, spending less time with family or partners).
- Intense engagement in collecting Internet pornography.
- Engaging in fantasy online acts or experiences which would be illegal if carried out (e.g., rape, child molestation).
- Decreased social or family interactive time due to online fantasy involvements.
- Being secretive or lying about amount of time spent online or type of sexual/romantic fantasy activities carried out online.
- Engaging with sexual or romantic partners met online, while also involved in marital or other primary relationship.
- Increasing complaints and concern from family or friends about the amount of time spent online.
- Frequently becoming angry or extremely irritable when asked to give up online involvement to engage with partners, family or friends.
- Primary focus of sexual or romantic life becomes increasingly related to computer activity (including pornographic CD-ROM use).
This test is used with permission from its author, Rob Weiss, M.A.